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23 December 2011

Happy Festivus

Happy Festivus my fellow Bloggers and Zombie aficionados.

Today is Festivus, a non-secular holiday that comes by every Dec. 23, it's Festivus for the rest of us.

For those of you not familiar with the Holiday it is one that finds its origins from the Great Wise Man, Frank Costanza, from the TV series Seinfeld. Granted it was a made up Holiday, but today there are many who actually celebrate it.

Now gather around the Festivus Pole (an unadorned Aluminum pole, since the Great Wise Frank describes it "It requires no decoration. I find tinsel distracting ... It's made from aluminum. Very high strength-to-weight ratio."). It is time for the Airing of Grievances (don't take any offense if I single you out for something this is all in good fun and yes I may make up a grievence or two just to have some fun).

First grievance goes to Bryan (Vampifan): You are nothign but a lousy show off, hoarding your great undead mini hoard over us, and shaming us all with your great paper modeling skills, may you become trapped under your hoard without help until you rot.

Next one goes to Fran (TheAngryLurker): You fat lazy SOB, always giving poor innocent Ray a hard time.

Ray: You whimpering little baby, always whining when Fran picks on you, grow a spine.

LuckyJoe: Take a shower already, we can smell you from 1/2 a continent way.

Colin (CMNash): Get off your fat wart covered bum and post some more Zombie related stuff.

Ed Texeria (: The Great Two Hour Wargames guy): You are nothing but a lousy, two faced, money grubbing crook, telling us that this game or that game will be out soon and them making us wait forever for you to actually release it, may the fires of hell sprout us and consume you for all of eternity.

Finally one last grievance to air, this one is directed at .................................ME: You sloven, unmotivated, disease infested, maggot ridden corpse, you need to take the time to actually play more then a quick little game of ATZ, and don't use the excuse that but I don't have time because of work, either, it wont fly. Also get off that arse of your's build some more terrain and get more Zombie minis, paint them and then take pics of everything.

OK that's all the grievances I have for now, again if I singled you out and said anything don't take any offense it was all in fun and you all are actually great guys and I am glad to know you through Blogger or the various gaming sites and forums.

Now I will open up the floor to anyone else who may have a grievance or two that they want to air.

The Feat of Strength will be skipped this year in favor of everyone playing a game of their favorite Zombie rule system or watching a Zombie movie of their choice.


  1. Take offence, Doug? No way, man, I'm too busy laughing my ass off! Plus, I'm honoured that I got singled out first. Sheesh, how sad does that make me?

    Now excuse me but I've got my "Dawn of the Dead" boxed set of 4 DVDs to watch - that's over 11 hours of material! And yes, it is the George A Romero version I'm talking about. Honestly, it doesn't get any better thab this! Merry Christmas, Doug. I'm proud to have you as a friend!

  2. Gl├Ždelig jul...

    You grumpy old fart!

  3. LOL! Fine, I'll take a shower. :) I love Seinfeld. Happy Festivus.

  4. Hey at least you guys aren't a sloven, unmotivated, disease infested, maggot ridden corpse like that last guy, who ever it could be. :P LOL

    I am not a big Seinfeld fan, though Kramer was the awesome. I do like the idea of Festivus though, a holiday that isn't tied to any one religion, and doesn't have the in your face commercialism attached to it like Christmas now does. Many Seinfeld fans probably don't realize that Festivus has been around longer then the show, it originally came from, I believe, the father of one of the writers, and wasn't celebrated by his family during the December Holidays..

  5. Happy Christmas!!!!!!!!!!! LOL